When children are toddlers, 2 or 3 years old, they begin to learn about seasons of the year, fall, winter, spring and summer. Naming our seasons, months and hours gives us stability, as we conceptualize our time. We need to be able to use these terms to make sense of our lives in time.
The same is true of our religious lives. Christianity, as well as other religions, configures time into holidays and seasons of the year. These seasons help us make sense of the life of Jesus and of the Church, and they also help us to shape our faith to make sense of our religious lives. My sons, as well as other children, liked learning about the Christian year, because I used a fun little rap-like ditty to teach it, written by Helen Kemp, a well-known Church musician and Christian educator. I have heard from other parents that their children can repeat the rap, many years after learning it and are teaching it to their own children. Here it is: (I added the bold to help you know where the emphasis should be placed for the rap.)
Advent, Christmas, Epiphany, Lent;
Then comes Easter and the Pentecost event!
Even more fun, is the fact that each season has its own liturgical color and theme. Right now in 2025, we are in the season of Lent, which started on March 5. If you go into any mainline protestant church or Roman Catholic church, the altar cloths and the banners will be purple, (unless someone forgot to change them!) The colors remind people, especially those who can’t read, like very young children as well as those in Medieval times before the printing press came along, of the season and what it means. I think this is one reason children enjoy learning these facts about the seasons; they can know something and can think and participate on some level in worship without being able to read or understand the liturgy. Purple stands for passion, and kings sometimes wore purple. Explain to children that passion means feeling deeply about something. People get purple in the face with anger and with excitement, as well as pain.
Of all the seasons of the Christian year, Lent is my least favorite. (Frankly, I’ve never ever heard anyone say, “I just love Lent!” ) It is the season which leads up to the circumstances of Jesus’ death. When I was growing up, at church I had to watch graphic films of Jesus dying on the cross, accompanied by the admonition that his death was my fault! I didn’t understand how that could be. More important, we had no observance or mention of Lent at home. Needless to say, I continued my family’s tradition and had no family observance of Lent with my own children. Do we really need to broach the subject of Lent with children?
Yes, we do. I should have tried harder to observe Lent at home. Lent is the interruption we need when we are adrift without sails or paddles, as we all are at times. Lent helps us stop when we feel like we are in a runaway car without brakes. We can stop our busy activities to reflect on what’s important in life. It is a time to reassess our lives, to plan our path forward and to reconnect to the God who strengthens us to do so. Children may not yet feel adrift or out of control, but they can develop the Lenten habits to help them later in life, when they do have those feelings.
My daughter-in-law has done better than I did helping their children develop Lenten habits. Their involvement in their church has helped, I believe, but she has also modeled habits she wants to develop in her children. This Lenten season, she has committed herself to writeng a letter to someone each day. I received my letter yesterday, and it was a nice, uplifting treat to receive a real letter from someone, instead of advertisements and solicitations for my money. This is a simple service that a busy parent can perform to be helpful in the world.
The themes of Lent are sacrifice and repentance, so the Roman Catholic Church, in particular, has advocated that individuals give up something pleasurable during Lent to remind them of Jesus’ sacrifice. More recently, more Christians are opting to sacrifice their time and find ways to serve others during Lent, instead of just giving up candy or movies. Spending more time in prayer, meditation or just thinking time are good Lenten habits to develop. (I have written a separate post about prayer.)
I wish our family had spent more time during Lent, especially, to look for activities in service to others. There are usually food drives in March children can be involved in, but if not, your family can host your own fundraising to benefit local food shelves by having a lemonade and baked goods stand, for instance. Yesterday when I was on my afternoon walk, I met a couple of older people, about my age, picking up trash along the sidewalk and putting it into the bag they had brought. I thanked them for doing this service for us. When the snow melts in Minnesota in the spring, it reveals a lot of trash in the grass and under the trees and on the sidewalk, but we like to appreciate the beauty of our area, so it is a great service to all of us when citizens pick up the trash to reveal God’s beauty for us again.
Is there anyone in your neighborhood or your family who is ill, has suffered a death in the family or has a new baby? Your family can take food to them or even just cards your kids make, after you call them first. My grandkids are getting old enough now to mow the yard and to shovel snow. Is there an elderly or infirm neighbor who could use your children’s help with yard work? I know that children, and to be honest, adults too, want to be paid for all their work, but Lent is the time of year to concentrate on volunteering and to develop habits of thinking of people who may need our help. Present this to children as a Lenten sacrifice, and remind them how good the people will feel receiving their help. I had a friend in one place where I worked who was extremely gifted at knowing who and which organizations needed help. I don’t know how she developed this extraordinary gift, but it was incredible. Did she just listen well or did she seek out the information in some way? Some way or another, her brain had developed the capacity to latch on to the information she needed to serve as many people as she could and to share that information with others. Service is a pillar of her life.
Please be gentle with children during Lent, without requiring their penitence, sorrow or sacrifice. Never use or teach children shame; they will learn shame on their own soon enough. Rather, model self-giving and service, looking for those who need our help, and enlist your children’s help to reach out to them. Model a need to be quiet within yourself and meditate or give thanks in prayer. Pray with them as part of your bedtime routine and at meals.
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